THE BEST SINGLE OF 2010

• Cee Lo Green – “Fuck You.” If you didn’t get this song stuck in your head for at least a few weeks after it premiered on the Internet, there is something fundamentally wrong with you.  It has a genuine joie de vivre that is rarely seen in pop music, and damn if it isn’t fun as hell to sing along to.  I have a feeling this song will be turning up in karaoke bars for years to come.  Let’s just hope it’s this version and not the radio-friendly edit.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pc0mxOXbWIU

THE WORST SINGLE OF 2010

• Cee Lo Green – “Forget You.” What do you do if you have a track that’s catching like wildfire but too profane to play on the radio or TV?  Sanitize it by turning “fuck” into “forget.”  Then Gwyneth Paltrow can sing it on Glee and ruin it for everybody!  This bowdlerized version of the song sucks all the fun and joy from it and leaves it on the side of the road like a sex crime victim, helpless and broken. Every time I hear it, I’m like “Fuck you.”

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4fq_MDgEzRM

THE FIVE BEST ALBUMS OF 2010

1. Kanye West – My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. I didn’t see this one coming.  I hadn’t been a Kanye fan since Graduation, and like many others I find the level of hubris in his public persona to be more than a little off-putting.  Frankly, he’s just not the most likeable guy.  But when I listened to this album for the first time, it blew me away.  And it has continued to blow me away every time I’ve listened to it since then.  It’s ambitious, bombastic, decadent, and surprisingly emotional.  It is the album of someone whose back was against the ropes so he came out swinging.  There are no apologies here and no half measures.  It’s simply a great album from a supremely self-confident artist.
2. Arcade Fire – The Suburbs. Before My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy came long, I was entirely certain that The Suburbs would be my album of the year.  It’s one of those albums that came along at just the right time for me, mirroring much of the suburban angst and ennui that I had been feeling in my personal life.  It’s an album that is deeply pessimistic without being cynical, and just upbeat enough to not let its underlying themes utterly crush the listener.  It is an enjoyable listen from start to finish with little to no filler.  Although purists probably still stick with Funeral as their top pick, The Suburbs has become my favorite Arcade Fire album yet.
3. The National – High Violet. Whereas The Suburbs pulls its punches a bit by keeping the instrumentals consistently more upbeat than the lyrics, High Violet makes no apologies for being an utterly downbeat, sad sack album.  The National have never been known for their sunny dispositions, and High Violet won’t change anyone’s mind on that.  They are great at what they do, though, and what they do is make music that you can listen to while drinking whiskey and feeling sorry for yourself.
4. The Walkmen – Lisbon. For times when you want to spend a few hours with your buddies drinking whiskey but not feeling like a sad sack, you really can’t go wrong with Lisbon.  Whereas High Violet is for the nights where you lose track of your limit and wake up sick the next morning, full of regret and remorse, Lisbon is for quiet nights out where you reminisce about good times and toast to the future.  The Walkmen rarely disappoint, but this album finds them in top form.  It is easily their best release since Bows + Arrows.
5. Yeasayer – Odd Blood. Albums that come out at the beginning of the year often seem to get overlooked at the end of the year.  Judging by some of the other “best of” lists I’ve read so far, this is one of those albums.  You’d be hard-pressed to find another album that sounds quite like it, though.  It’s quirky, unique, and surprisingly catchy.  It’s been ten months since its release and I still get “Ambling Alp” stuck in my head now and then.  If you missed Odd Blood earlier in the year, go pick it up now.

THE FIVE MOST DISAPPOINTING ALBUMS OF 2010

1. Sufjan Stevens – The Age of Adz. People who hated the twee preciousness of Illinois were downright ecstatic that he all but abandoned it for his sometimes difficult, often atonal follow-up.  But you know what?  I like the twee preciousness of Illinois, and the lush instrumentation, and the fact that listening to “Casimir Pulaski Day” still makes me a little teary-eyed.  The Age of Adz is a decent enough album, and kudos to Stevens for not just retreading his earlier work, but in the end it just did not reach the level of greatness of its predecessor.
2. Weezer – Death to False Metal. I keep trying to like new Weezer albums, and they just keep being awful.  This year we got the one, two punch of their newest effort, Hurley, followed by a collection of tracks from the discard pile, Death to False Metal.  I had some hope for the latter.  Perhaps there would be some hidden gems from the Pinkerton era (a.k.a. the last time they were relevant).  Alas, it was not to be.  This disc is an utter turd.
3. Frightened Rabbit – The Winter of Mixed Drinks. This album has some really strong songs on it.  Unfortunately, they are buried under some of the worst production of the year.  Frightened Rabbit have become unfortunate victims of the loudness war.  Every instrument on this album is dialed up to 11, and the result is that I can’t listen to more than a couple tracks without getting a headache.  That approach might work for hip-hop or hard rock, but not here.  It’s a damn shame, because The Winter of Mixed Drinks could have been so much better.
4. Matt & Kim – Sidewalks. Matt and Kim’s sophomore effort, Grand, was one of my favorite albums of 2009.  It was upbeat, catchy, and had an endearing, DIY charm to it.  Unfortunately, much of that charm was lost in the transition to the more polished, radio-friendly production of Sidewalks.  It’s not a terrible album, but after a couple of listens I haven’t had any desire to pop it back in my CD player.
5. Nicki Minaj – Pink Friday. Nicki Minaj has been steadily building steam in the last few years, between some memorable turns on mix tapes and a fantastic, over-the-top performance in Kanye West’s My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy.  Then her first album came out and… yawn.  It was yet another lesson in how artists that sound good on mixtapes don’t necessarily translate well to full album format (see also: Wale’s Attention Deficit).

In this, the landmark twentieth episode of Audio Assault, Jere and Oswald dissect Kanye’s new masterpiece and the latest installment of the Harry Potter franchise. Plus: Oswald interviews Miss Alex White of White Mystery -- they talk about booking shows, writing songs, and making buttons.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yE9gh4COMdI

In this episode the guys squash the lo-fi indie rock gimmick, the Weezer CD, as well as the VMAs, and why it’s bad to take advice from Taylor Swift.

Subscribe to our podcast in iTunes

Show Music

• Her Words Destroyed My Planet – Single – Motion City Soundtrack
• The Walkmen – Stranded
• Weezer – Ruling Me

Picks of the Week

• Oswald: Son of Schmilsson – Harry Nilsson, Buying MP3s from Amazon
• Jere: Newbury Comics, Chocolate
• “The After-Party” Timmy: Dominos BBQ Chicken Pizzas with no fucking onions, Richard Roeper nailing goth chicks
• Clymer: Abe Vigoda – Crush, Wake Up Everybody (feat. Common & Melanie Fiona) – Single – John Legend & The Roots

Dicks of the Week

• Oswald: Himself
• Jere: Taylor Swift
• “The After-Party” Timmy: Skull Candy Headphones
• Clymer: The Pope (Ed. Note, Yea, we said it. The Pope.)

Alternative Show Titles

• Blind Spots
• Yea Jesus is Pretty Cool
• Black Norah Jones
• Starbucks Soul Man
• What about a Dick!!!
• The Pope Mobile Only Uses Premium

Jere, Clymer, Oswald, and “The After-Party” Timmy formerly known as “Third World” Timmy discuss how much hypem sucks, as well as the pronunciation of the word hubris, and the universal language of cock! Off-topic… topics discussed were getting banned on twitter, smoking lots of weed, internet personas, spambots, and Russian nesting dolls.

Musical topics include Hypem, Kanye West, Weezer, and Mad Men.

Picks of the week

• Jere: Call Me Lightning, and the Scott Pilgrim vs. The World video game
• Jeremy: Bombay Bicycle Club – I had the Blues but I shook them loose. Riff Tracks Live showing Reefer Madness
• Tim: The Gaslight Anthem – American Slang, and Music Skins
• Oswald: The New Wale Mixtape, and the weed he bought last week

I know that everybody likes Nada Surf now because they’re indie heartthrobs equally at home soundtracking a scene on The O.C. or spinning out lonely, pretty melodies while you drink wine straight from the bottle at 2am. But I originally liked Nada Surf back in the ’90′s, when they released “Popular.” (For those that don’t remember, there is YouTube.) It seemed like these guys were going to be the next Weezer, but instead they ended up being more critically-respected, if not commercially successful, than that band -- although, to my knowledge, they’ve never collaborated with Lil Wayne. So for the moment I’ll continue to call the advantage Weezer’s, but whatever. Nada Surf is rad too, and this video is proof. It’s for the song “Electrocution,”  originally by Bill Fox, and before you ask me “Wait -- who’s Bill Fox? Why is Nada Surf playing his song,” just hold up and let me look at the press release. OK: This is from guys’ new record if i had a hi-fi, which features Nada Surf exclusively playing other people’s songs. And Bill Fox is “a Cleveland musician.” It all makes a little more sense now, eh? if i had a hi-fi drops June 8, and here’s the video:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdzUi4IeMXw

Soft Right, the debut EP by Chicago’s own Pet Lions, showcases a band that’s got confidence and style to burn. I go through a lot of EPs and demos and crazy shit like that trying to find new stuff we can share with our readers here at AssaultBLOG, and this Pet Lions CD knocked me on my ass. It’s by far the tastiest nugget I’ve yet had the pleasure of chewing up and then regurgitating for you, dear reader.

Soft Right is kind of like Vampire Weekend re-imagined for the Midwest, with a stronger Weezer influence and a gloomier outlook. Also: no African guitar sounds, but that’s okay. These are smart and breezy songs about Italian vacations and dancing vs. not-dancing. The music is sharp and melodic without being cloying, and the songs are sad but they never veer into melodrama. Pet Lions are cocky, but not jerky; Soft Right opens a small window into their world, and they make very good company.

Singer Karl Østby has a pretty good formula worked out: On opener “Roman History” he drops a rapid-fire narrative over some punchy riffs, and the effect is like Rivers Cuomo fronting the Strokes, with some bright, chimey flourishes accentuating the tune’s underlying melancholy. “Maybe,” he sings, “you need to stop thinkin’ ’bout how much you miss the other girl,” advice that he can’t bring himself to take throughout the rest of the songs here. “Propeller Plane” finds Østby hiding out behind the Circus Maximus, and his location in “Stuck At The Bottom” is pretty plainly telegraphed in the song’s title; this is a dude who doesn’t “mind waiting for you to be alone again” and promises to “kiss you discretely in the plaza where we met.” I know I might not be Mr. Østby’s dream date, but consider me seduced just the same.

Every band needs a secret weapon, and Pet Lions’ is easy to identify: Shuhei Yamamoto rounds all these songs out with perfect bass lines, the kind that feel lifted from old Cure songs but sound clearly original. The guitar work throughout (by Østby and Tom Owens) is pleasant but decidedly slight; there’s plenty of room for the bass to breathe, and the band achieves its most striking, immediately satisfying moment on “I Will Track You Down” when Østby sneers “Everybody stop / She’s ain’t comin’ home with you / She’s coming home with me” over just Matt Dahl’s kicky, Spoon-y drums. Pet Lions are junior masters of dynamics – they know it’s the small touches that really matter, and they seem to have an organic, intuitive grip on what actually works. There’s not a touch here that feels out of place.

The main thing, as usual, is fun, and Soft Right is super fun. The band will give it to you for free if you sign up for their email list, so there’s no reason not to be all over this. All smart-sounding bullshit aside, I burned these tracks onto a CD and I take that CD everywhere now; this is the kind of music that re-awakens old feelings and makes me nostalgic for stuff that never happened. It is deep romantic longing set to boilerplate indie with small, smart touches that make it pretty much essential. You’ll want to play it for all your friends, and if they don’t get into it, you’ll like them a little bit less. It’s pretty good.

More Pet Lions:

• Pet Lions MySpace
• Pet Lions Twitter
• Pet Lions Facebook

It’s difficult to know how to take a new Weezer record. (Opens in iTunes) Rivers Cuomo has piloted his gang of misfits through enough ups, downs, twists, and turns to kill your average nerd-rock outfit, but they’ve executed Raditude, their seventh record, with the kind of gleefully careless aplomb you don’t often see in 15-year veterans. These dudes have been making music as long as I’ve been seriously listening to it and so it’s a pleasure to report that, whatever your personal take on Weezer circa 2009, they still have the pop smarts, the dulcet melodies, and the bracing audacity that have defined their entire career. What you want to do with these gifts, once bestowed, is your own damn business.

Weezer - Raditude (link opens in iTunes)

“(If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To,” the record’s first single, captivates on first listen with a spare beat and some rhythmic acoustic guitar; Cuomo pairs this refreshingly simple backdrop with his most evocative lyrics since the emotional bloodletting of Pinkerton. He’s telling a story, which is nice, but he’s also fleshing it out with details and wit, which is even nicer. Then the chorus explodes, and you must choose your course of action: you can pout that this latest incarnation of Weezer’s sound doesn’t touch you the way the band’s earlier work did, or you can leave behind your preconceived notions about what a bunch of middle-aged dudes with mortgages and kids should be playing. I’m here to tell you, take the ride. Raditude is great fun.

The record is front-loaded, though not to the extent the Red album was. Cuomo handles the majority of the songwriting duties here, which is for the best – I’d rather have plane-crash-awful and embarrassing than generic. But the majority of Raditude, even when it devolves into the inevitable back-half filler, won’t disappoint anybody not specifically looking to be disappointed. “The Girl Got Hot,” “Tripping Down The Freeway,” and “I’m Your Daddy” all pulse with an innocence and energy that few other bands deliver this consistently, and the final stretch (culminating with “I Don’t Want To Let You Go” and “Turn Me Round,” two tracks that actually deliver on the promise that Weezer have spent their last four records actively trying to make you forget) ends everything on an extremely positive note. Raditude is the first thing Cuomo and company have released in ages that might make you excited to hear what they do next.

So where do they get into trouble? A lot of folks will probably point to the asinine Lil Wayne guest verse on “Can’t Stop Partying,” but that doesn’t bother me nearly as much the truly odd New Ageisms and Bollywood instrumentation of “Love Is The Answer.” The takeaway there is probably that these guys should stick to what they do best, but I’m fine indulging Weezer in a few skippable faux-experimental tracks than see them devolve back into the blandness that characterized the Green album and Make Believe. And while it’s a shame that the other members of the group don’t get to share the limelight more (beastly drummer Pat Wilson in particular, a man way more skilled than you’d guess were Raditude your only exposure to his playing), and while I surely miss the amped up metal riffs that have provided most of the excitement in the second half of their career, I’m willing to make a few concessions if I can get something as wickedly loose as “Let It All Hang Out” (which finds Cuomo bemoaning the economy and his “freakin’ jerk” of a boss).

Overall, the disc makes a strong case for Weezer as they actually are: four guys that won’t let go of their signature sound or their naivety, have tried to expand and experiment but found themselves adrift in sonic confusion, and that have ultimately decided to just go balls-out and enjoy the extremely weird trip they’ve found themselves on. This is the sound, in short, of a band committing. Love ‘em or hate ‘em, they just can’t be any other way.

One of these Tuesday mornings I’m hoping that when I take a quick peak at the top songs in the “Rock” category on iTunes there will really be something is not only rock, but also good. I’m not one to complain and not do anything about it so I’ve taken it upon myself to hopefully bring you a few new songs that aren’t Daughtry, Creed, or John Mayer-esque in sound.

iTunes Top 10 singles in Rock at the time of this blog post. Meh

The Swellers – Fire Away

The Swellers remind me of a cooler, less emo version of what Saves the Day used to be back when I was in high school. Drawing from their experience touring with Less Than Jake, Set Your Goals, and Four Year Strong, The Swellers finally seemed to have made their break as they’re now opening up for Paramore. They sound kinda like somewhere between punk rock and Lit–if you can imagine what that’s like.

AFI – Medicate

AFI was one of my favorite bands growing up. (All the way back to their All Hallows Eve and hardcore screaming days) They seem to have grown up quite a bit and still manage to turn out solid albums despite being around for over 18 years now.

Thousand Foot Krutch – Fire It Up

I honestly can’t remember how I found these guys, but all I can say is they’re good, and this song is good. If you’re like me and kinda feel like a pussie when you listen to pop punk, this should help.

Brand New – You Stole

My first Brand New show was in the back of a bowling alley at the Fireside Bowl off of Fullerton in Chicago back when they were still having rock and roll shows there. They were OPENING for Thrice, and now they’re filling up the Aragon Ballroom. Our resident music critic, Oswald Hobbes reviewed their new album Daisy just recently. Check that out if you haven’t.

Weezer – (If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To

The first album I ever owned was “The Blue Album” by Weezer cause my mom wouldn’t let me get the Offspring cd cause it had a parental advisory sticker. In retrospect, it wasn’t that bad of a decision. Feel free to disagree, but there’s no way Five for Fighting should be ahead of Weezer… on a rock chart… ever.

Wolfmother – New Moon Rising

Everytime I listen to Wolfmother I feel like I stepped in a time machine. A time machine of awesome. This single off their new album definitely deserves to be in the top ten. Maybe just one spot above Daughtry.

Dagoba – The Things Within

So I just found out about these guys, and posted  their music video. I don’t know how I missed them because this song is over three years old now, but I guess that’s what I get for “going away to art school” as they say.

VersaEmerge – Past Praying For

I’m not doing this because all the bands on this list are fronted by dudes–I swear. VersaEmerge is a relatively new band, and another band on the Fueled by Ramen bill along with The Swellers. If you’re kind of into Evanescence but a bit less dreary, and quite a bit more upbeat–check this song out.

Oh, Sleeper – Son of the Morning

If Dustin Kensrue of Thrice decided to start making serious rock again like he used to, except draw from a bit more heavy bands like Killswitch Engage and Poison The Well, then Oh, Sleeper would be somewhat close to the result. A bit scream-o and a bit Fear Factory, this one will give you a nice kick in the ass in the morning, and it’s been proven to have more caffeine than that powdery instant coffee from Starbucks.

Taking Dawn – Time to Burn

For those of you that remember the band The Union Underground (What happened to them anyways?) you’ll do just fine with Taking Dawn. A little bit Axel Rose, a little bit Atreyu. Definitely worth the one dollar download.

Now I’m no Oswald Hobbes, but I do tend to be somewhat particular about what I think is good rock music, so if you completely disagree and think I don’t know what I’m talking about… that’s fine. Post some rock songs in the comments or send me a tweet and point me in the right direction.

Lead me to the promised land o’ internet trolls.