In this amazingly tight and concise episode of Audio Assault, which does not go over time and features all of the hosts staying completely on topic for the entire duration, Oswald is joined by Dr. Joe Gibson and Chicago scenester Todd Abbott. The guys discuss, in no particular order: Orny Adams, Teen Wolf, prom, Joe’s height, Todd’s vegetarian agenda, Taco Bell, chocolate milk shakes, hipsters in Chicago, the pros and cons of blogging, Facebook, more Orny Adams, Kanye West, Joe’s library, cassette tapes, Woodstock ’94, time zones, the concept of time itself, IMBD message boards, Dexter, and Picks & Dicks.

“Free is the new black” as one of my favorite authors Martin Atkins says, and the best way to prove to your everyday casual music fan that your band’s music is something they could get into is to give it away for free! Assault.it has tirelessly scoured the web the past three months to find what we consider to be some of the best signed, and unsigned bands offering up their music for free to their fans, and soon-to-be-fans. Download as you see fit, and if you like what you hear, go to a show, buy a t-shirt, buy an album, or at the very least tell a friend!

1. Direct Hit!

FUCK YOU! GET PUMPED! To call these guys the Andrew WK of punk rock would be somewhat of an insult, but in the interest of appealing to everyman 1.0 that’s what these guys are. Hardcore power punk at its finest, and the best live show I’ve ever witnessed. You can check out our full review of their latest EP #4 here if you want to see why we think this band is your favorite new band.

Get Pumped! Direct Hit! MySpace | BandCamp (The free shit is here)

2. Makeshift Prodigy -- Mathematica

Makeshift Prodigy is giving away a single off their freshly-released album Mathematica! According to Third World Timmy this band is one of the best new bands in the city of Chicago, and is his pick to click to break out in the next year or two. Check out our review of Mathematica, as well as our live CD release show review, and interview with the guys.

Official Website | Download “Mathematica”

3. Empires

Select singles and entire albums from their MySpace for one of the most well known bands in Chicago with former members of The Academy Is… except these guys are way more awesomer.

Official Website | MySpace

4. The Delivery Boys

One of Chicago’s hidden secrets on the pop punk scene. You can check out our thoughts on the Chicago power-punkers here, or better yet, you can download their songs on their PureVolume page.

MySpace | PureVolume

5. Trippy Wicked

“[An] epic musical journey of songs about living the good life, fire, growing beards, girls, aliens, loneliness, love, and pirates.” That basically sums up the awesomeness of this UK import. You can download their album for free on their band camp.

Official Website | bandcamp

6. Carousel Kings

The Carousel Kings EP, Here Comes Trouble makes me feel like I’m driving 90 MPH on I-90 in towards Rockford, IL listening to Saves the Day at full blast in my ’93 Pontiac Bonneville. Fast-paced punk rock that you’re mildly embarrassed to sing along to.

MySpace | PureVolume (Free download here)

7. La Dispute

The first I’d heard of La Dispute was when I found out from R. Kelly (Ryan Kelly that is) that they’re on the same label as The Wonder Years, No Sleep Records. I was amazed to find a range of sound that starts at spoken word over what reminds me of Explosions in the Sky, and goes all the way to a highly polished screamo sound--which I’m a huge fan of.

MySpace | Thank You for Your Patience Free Downloads

8. Light In May

Metalcore from Conneticut that sound something like Poison The Well, one of Third World Timmy’s old school favorites.

MySpace | Merch Store |  PureVoume Free Downloads

9. The Decay

Canadian punk rock--not the Sum41 style punk rock though. If Dillinger Four had a Canadian love child, it’d be The Decay.

MySpace | This Month’s Rent Full Album Download

10. Mansions

The Get Up Kids meets Ryan Adams meets Dinosaur Jr. Words from their own MySpace.

MySpace | Merch Store | | Doghouse Records | Get OMG for just one tweet!

11. Anchor Eighty Four Compilation

Sign up for the mailing list and you get the full album. The album includes a song from a band we interviewed a few weeks ago, Newamerica. (Formerly The Discover Radio)

Sign up to get a full compilation album

12. Thrice -- Day Trotter Live Session

At one point Thrice was Third World Timmy’s band, but they’ve transitioned into more of an experience, than a rock and roll band. Still, they’re giving away a free album that you should get.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=SY1SwqLOC3c

Official Website | Download Full Live Session

13. Wipe Out Marshall

I can’t tell you much about this band because their “About Us” on their MySpace may as well have been written in alien, but the album is full of punk rock block, and totally worth checking out. EP: You Light This Match, We’ll Burn This City

MySpace | Download Free EP

14. Man the Change live in Brooklyn EP

New York based DIY punk rock band heavily influenced by one of “Third World” Timmy’s favorite punk rock groups, Hot Water Music.

MySpace | Download EP

15. Deadly Animals EP

Heavy metal is “Third World” Timmy’s favorite genre of music, and he’ll be the first to tell you that most of the unsigned groups offering up free music in said genre kinda suck--Deadly Animals on the other hand, do not suck. Gritty hard rock for fans of Static-X, Pantera, and Fear Factory.

MySpace | Download Demo EP

16. The Friday Night Boys

One of the newest signings to Fueled By Ramen, and we can understand why. One tweet gets you a free download of one of their new songs.

MySpace | Tweet to download

17. Apocalipstick

All girl  thrasher punk rock group from Irvine, CA. They’ll steal your heart then break it.

MySpace | Sign up for mail list to download

18. SHARKS -- Shallow Waters EP

British garage rock that sounds a bit like early The Strokes albums. PunkNews gave it 4.5/5

MySpace | EP Download

19. Campaign -- It Likes To Party EP

It’s no secret that we at Assault.it’s staff and crew like to party. This album therefore caught our attention and we believe it couldn’t be more appropriately titled. You can also get their previous EP for free in the same placed--the appropriately titled H1N1. For those of you fans of old Hot Water Music, you’re going to want to get both these albums.

MySpace | It Likes To Party EP Download | H1N1 Free Album Download

20. Dan Wythoff -- The Sunscreen EP

Great solo act that has the same amount of talent as a John Mayer and you won’t feel like a douche enabler by listening to it.

MySpace | Sign up for the newsletter for the Sunscreen EP

21. Cypress Hill -- It Ain’t Nothin’

With a new album on the way Cypress Hill has released one of their songs for free! Check it out and keep an eye out for their new album which we’ll be reviewing here on Assault.it.

Official Website | Download It Ain’t Nothin’ MP3

22-28. ReverbNation Playlist 7 (Click on Audio Library)

Every week ReverbNation posts 7 songs from different artists that are all available as a free download. The program has ended, but they still have a huge Audio Library you can get plenty of quality free music from.

More from ReverbNation | Download Playlist7 (Click on Audio Library)

29. Ship Wrecks

Acoustic rock that sounds like a more catchy version of The Swell Season (From Academy Award winning movie Once) and a little bit of Bright Eyes.

Official Website | Ship Wrecks bandcamp

30. Kismet -- Hiatus

Utrecht based indie-rock at it’s finest. Sort of sounds like a lighter version of Thursday.

Official Website | Kismet bandcamp

31. A Common Year -- Between Cities full length album

If you’ve seen Jimmy Eat World live and wish there were more bands like it it--look no more. A Common Year is a for fans of Brand New, Jimmy Eat World, Thrice, Northstar. Anberlin.

MySpace | A Common Year bandcamp

32. The Day Woke to Me Driving To You’s -- Rain, Rain, Rain EP

Sounds like Explosions in the Sky, Postal Service. Despite their complicated name, the music is quite soothing and nice.

MySpace | PureVolume | Download EP

33. He Is We -- Light A Way

Acoustic band that sounds like Paramore, VersaEmerge, Sarah Berielles. Included on the Top 20 Unsigned Bands of 2009 by PureVolume.

MySpace | PureVolume | Merch Store

34. Conditions -- Illuminati

I’ve been a fan of Conditions for awhile now. (Since I heard about them from ShredNews) For fans of anyone who likes The Ready Set, All Time Low, Set Your Goals, The Swellers. They’re offering the song “Illuminati” on their PureVolume for free.

MySpace | PureVolume Song Download

35. I Rival -- Make Me Scream

Sounds like Keeping Secrets, Our Last Night, The Word Alive, Set Your Goals, Conditions, The Used.

MySpace | Merch Store | PureVolume Song Download

36. The Bay State -- Liars

Talented female lead rock band that sounds a bit like Paramore/VersaEmerge, Be Your Own Pet.

MySpace | PureVolume Song Download

37. Picture Me Broken -- Dearest (I’m So Sorry)

Girl fronted rock band that resembles Lacuna Coil, Evanescence, Flyleaf, Arch Enemy. They made it on PureVolume’s top 20 unsigned of 2009, and deserve all the attention they get.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiEVPpCAD7Y

MySpace | PureVolume Song Download

38. Every You -- A Change of Scene

If you like The Swellers (Like we do) then you’ll love these guys--same goes for Strike Anywhere, Broadway, and any other seasoned punk rock group.

MySpace | Merch Store | PureVolume Song Download

39. My Arcadia -Lulea (City by the Sea)

Hard to classify who My Arcadia sounds like, but I would say it’s a mixture of Flyleaf, Hey Monday, Amy Lee, and the punk rock influence of one of our favorites Hayley Williams.

MySpace | Merch Store | PureVolume Song Download

40. Tonight Alive -- Wasting Away

I’ve said it 3-4 times now, but Tonight Alive sounds very much like Picture Me Broken, My Arcadia, Paramore, Flyleaf, and VersaEmerge. I can’t get enough girl-fronted rock band. Very high energy band that most bros would feel comfortable with playing loudly in their cars.

MySpace | PureVolume Song Download

41. Silversun Pickups -- Lazy Eye (Acoustic version)

Grammy nominated indie rockers the Silversun Pickups put up an acoustic version of their song, “Lazy Eye.” All you have to do is sign up for their mailing list!

Official Website | Sign up for newsletter for free song

42. Girl On Fire -- Summer Sampler EP

For fans of Alexisonfire, Taking Back Sunday, The Used, except more fast-paced, with more face-melting guitar riffs. It will make you feel like a man.

MySpace | Summer Sampler EP Download

43. Midwest Hype

I’ve never heard a jazz funk band before, but Midwest Hype is working their way into a genre that they’re dominating all their own. This entire album is on “Third World” Timmy’s island vacation mix that goes with him on all his tropical island getaways.

MySpace | ReverbNation | 3 songs: Sunrise Will End My Night Tonight, Big Poppa (cover), Runaway

44. A Hero Named Hope

One of the rising stars of the Chicago rock scene and one of the few bands that still resist the pop-punk trend and continue to play a heavier, more hardcore style of punk rock. Another live show worth seeing as they get better and better every show they do.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=n52Ew_XU5Po

MySpace | 2 Songs off their debut EP

45-46. Abel & Lorien -- Tour EP

If you like Brand New, you will literally shit your pants for Abel. Lorien is a bit more like Anberlin, Deas Vail, Academy Is…, Copeland according to LFM

Abel MySpace | Lorien MySpace | Tour EP Download

47. Alkaline Trio

It’s no secret that Alkaline Trio is one of Assault’s favorites. They recently gave away two songs off their new album, This Addiction which you should get cause it is awesome.

Official Website | Free Song Download

48. Bullet For My Valentine -- Begging For Mercy

One of the best metal acts around is giving away one of their songs off their new album for free. “Third World’ Timmy will be one of the first in line to pick up this new album in which he’ll no doubt declare it the best thing ever since Avenged Sevenfold.

Merch Store | Download “Begging For Mercy”

49. I Fight Dragons

Sign up for their mailing list, and get a link to an EP mixture of live music and awesome songs made from old school Nintendo sound effects. If that doesn’t tickle your pickle then you should just quit here at #1. They just signed to Atlantic Records and are now touring with the Too Fast For Love Tour w/3OH!3, Cobra Starship, Travis McCoy

MySpace | Official Website (Sign up for the newsletter to get the free EP!)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xd3GP57YUjw

50. Pet Lions

Indie pop rock from Chicago--sign up for their newsletter for their Soft Right EP!

MySpace | Download Soft Right EP

Sources:

Follow Legal Free Music on Tumblr
Top 20 Unsigned Bands of 2009 by PureVolume
ReverbNation

I hate music videos. Honestly, I do. I think they’re dorky, and unless you don’t mind hitting YouTube to mingle with twelve-year olds and mouth-breathers, there’s no good place to see them. But Chicago indie-rockers Welcome To Ashley have released one of the first really good examples of the form that I’ve seen in ages. The “Nothing But Gray Skies” clip steers clear of obviously fake performance footage and overwrought imagery, instead just presenting a simple, goofy storyline with a unique old-timey look. Plus, the song’s a real winner in and of itself: jangly pop with some raw energy, kind of like The Walkmen and Gaslight Anthem meeting at a leather bar and really hitting it off. The band’s recently-released Absent Man EP is currently streaming at their MySpace, and you don’t have anything better to do right now (trust me) than checking it out. But first, peep this shit:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8yJSjfh42E

Ever since the first time I saw Thrice live at the Fireside Bowl in Chicago when I was 16 I knew they’d be big. It’s been awhile since I connected as much with them (musically) on anything they’ve released, but I remain a loyal fan nonetheless. Here’s their new video I stumbled across on MySpace:

Let’s face it, unless you have a full time person to make your MySpace totally  bitchin, it’s time to look into another platform to use as your main contact point with your fans. I understand MySpace has always been a necessary evil, but when it comes to actually getting a decent return on investment from your time spent, MySpace will never make the cut.

You cannot track where your fans are coming from

While you can boast a high pageview count, high friend count, and high play count on your songs, you’ll never really know who is doing what on your profile.

You don’t know who the talkers are

The most important part of getting good word of mouth is identifying the talkers. Who is bringing people to your shows? What regions is your music being downloaded the most from based on those “talkers”?

What blogs and twitter users have pimped your page?

Other bands are not your primary source of attendance

According to the statistics I’ve heard, there are roughly 8 million bands on MySpace, and you have 15,000 of them as friends! Unfortunately, those people are probably not buying your albums or attending your shows. While they may be good to do a show swap with, or bro down with for a tour some day–they’re not helping you pay the bills and put butts in your seats.

The 10% of users that are real people more than likely COMPLETELY ignore the “bulletins” that you can blast out to everyone. When was the last time you went to a show based on a bulletin you saw on MySpace?

Controlling your brand is impossible

You’re a band, but the day you decide you want to try to make a living off of your passion you are a brand–a product. Even if you have created a badass theme for your profile, you still can’t control the look of any of the other subsequent pages associated with MySpace. (Add me as a friend, send a message, blog etc.)

This doesn’t even consider the sheer bombardment of advertising you have on the top and bottom of your profile page. Best part is, if you figure out how to hide the advertisements, you’re in violation of MySpace’s terms of use and risk getting your profile deleted.

You can do everything MySpace  does outside of the MySpace universe

Just to prove my point, you can do everything that MySpace does for you, I’ll post a few of the other places that offer the same services. (For free of course)

Embed your music
Imeem offers the ability to upload and create a playlist that you can then embed on your site, for free. Best part is that other people can embed your songs as well. Last.fm also offers this service

Fucking blog
My number one tip to anyone who does anything these days online is to WRITE. MySpace’s blog platform sucks ass, and offers no clean way for users get your content without being at a MySpace page. WordPress is easy to find/create templates for and is a far more dynamic platform to control/track your band’s internet presence. Commenting, subscribing to your RSS feed, and integrating with newsletter platforms is almost entirely drag+drop on WordPress.

Bulletins
Twitter.

Local Concerts iPhone Application. (opens in iTunes)

Tour Dates
With Last.fm you can post your tour dates which will then show up on their website as well as on their concerts iPhone application which I never leave home without. Last.fm also integrates with Livekick which sends users notifications of when your band is playing in the users’ area.

Last.fm also recently released one of my personal favorite iPhone applications Local Concerts. (Opens iTunes) Which will send you text messages when a concert has been posted by you. You’ll never miss another show again.

Sell Music and Merchandise
Last.fm allows you to sell your music that you upload which can also be embedded–oh and you can track it too. WP-E-commerce and Storenvy are two tried and tested ways to sell your merchandise and/or music in your own customizable store.

WordPress may require a bit more of advanced skills, but Storenvy allows you to host an online store on their servers where they handle everything from site setup to checkout. I highly recommend them. (Not to mention they’re the best printers we’ve ever worked with. We should know, we still print our clothing line with them.)

Disagree with me?

Feel free to post it in the comments as well as any other resource sites I may have missed.

Unlike a good portion of the design related blogs on the internet, we at AssaultBLOG try to write as much of our own content as we can rather than just link to other peoples’ hard work. It’s also been awhile since we’ve written an extensive tutorial so I’ve decided to make our own list of best posts from Assault that you may have missed if you just recently started subscribing to our RSS feed.

5 Tips to make your unsigned band stand out from the rest

List of tips to spend your hard earned day job money to make your band stand out from the rest.

HTML emails – A quick rules and primer tutorial

Thinking of writing an html newsletter? Consider these few things first.

When Every Sale Counts

When you launch your first online store, it takes forever to get sales. This article will give you a few insights as to how you can get those first few sales even when your traffic is relatively low.

SEO Tips and strategies the high priced consultants aren’t telling you

Don’t feel like paying $2,000 for an SEO audit of your site? Read this list of tips and it will greatly help you fare better in the SEO world. This is my most comprehensive and one of my best SEO articles to date.

How to float to the top of Google search pages

Interested in what gets you in the top ten search results for Google searches? I list out my secrets for free! (This list is a great list especially if you have no money to spend like I don’t.)

E-Commerce tips explained with some interesting human behavior psychology

Do you know why we sometimes find ourselves excitedly buying things we don’t really need?  I came across this outline from a book by Dan Ariely called, “Predictably Irrational” that had some incredibly insightful information about people and why we at times seem to act completely irrational. It covers giving away  things for free, putting high price points on products to create demand, and even the benefit of arousal!

How to reset your Myspace page using CSS

A brief tutorial with working code to make your Myspace look a bit more respectable. If you don’t want to read the whole post, you can just copy/paste/edit the source code that is supplied.

Tips & tools to improve your conceptual web design

A list of tools that will help bring your web designs one step closer to print designs including non-standard web fonts, custom line breaks, and transparency across all browsers.

Assault Photoshop Brush Set 1

The first set of brushes released from some of our t-shirt designs that were never used.

5 tips & resources to help get your t-shirt company off the ground

During my time at the university of hard knocks in the t-shirt business I learned a few things that I share here with anyone else who may be starting a t-shirt company so they don’t have to go through the same growing pains that I did.

How to create your own Photoshop Brushes

A step by step tutorial outlining how to create your own Photoshop brushes so you don’t have to spend hours scouring the net for the perfect brush.

How to use Photoshop Brush Dynamics

Part two of my brush tutorials where I show you how to use brush dynamics to get some cooler effects with your brushes that you’ve created in the Photoshop brush tutorial.

How to make those trendy lasers and light bursts in Photoshop

I’ve seen tons of ads with cool looking light bursts and light rays, and decided to write a step by step tutorial on how it was done. Originally, I believe I saw them in wired from designer, Tom Muller, so I even got in touch with him and interviewed him to find out more about his design process.

Alternative ways to find design inspiraiton

My personal best ways to find design inspiration when watching tv or going to the park just doesn’t cut it.

Turn a WordPress blog into your own personal FFFFound

A wordpress theme tutorial with included plugins that will allow you to make your own FFFFound blog like I have done on VNovember.com.

Like what you see here?

I write one quality post like this at least every week, and time permitting I make additional posts about the music industry, apparel industry, and design. Subscribe to the RSS feed, it’s worth every penny.

MySpace Background Template

One of the items I struggled to get right with my brand more than the blog, more than the shirt designs, more than the online store, more than the SEO and link exchanging was the god damn Myspace. I don’t know why, but for some reason a staple of your brand besides a decent Twitter and blog presence is to have a Myspace page. Add us as a friend on Myspace, or at the very least checkout what your Myspace will look like if you start using this theme.

In all my years of web design and development I’ve never had anything be quite as big of a pain in the ass as a Myspace layout and getting it to look the way I wanted. After three different Myspace “resets” I think I’ve finally found one that helps get you back to a mildly respectable looking page.

Download Assault’s Myspace Reset

A few things you should note when editing this file for your Myspace:

• Colors need to be changed in several places
• No # signs are used in the color hex codes
• No Javascript allowed
• No CSS shorthand, you have to type it all out

Before Copying/Pasting the Myspace Reset CSS into your profile about me area, make sure to copy the URLs to your Add to Friends, Send Message, and any of the other links contained within your Contact box because it will be hidden by the CSS. I suggest making an image and using some sort of online image map tool, to apply your add to friends and contact links as appropriate as I have done.

Elements we will be hiding

1. Contact Information
2. MySpace URL
3. Blog Listing
4. Extended Network Box

Change Images

You can download the image I have used here for my layout to get an idea of where to position your background image. You will also need to upload your background to some remote third party website such as your own web host or your Flickr account. Make sure to change the background-image: url() to the url of your background image or else it will show my background and I’m sure you don’t want that. The first code block in the reset CSS contains the background-image URL you see below:

   body {
  font-size: 1px; line-height: 1px; font-family: georgia, times, 'times new roman', sans-serif;
  background-color:000000;
   background-image:url(http://www.assaultshirts.com/images/myspace_bg.jpg);
  background-attachment: none;
  background-position:center center;
  background-repeat:no-repeat;     }

Change Colors

I recommend going through and changing the colors in one batch find/replace because the colors show up in several places and it can be hard to keep track of the sheer number of CSS colors because of the strange organisation of the Myspace Layout.

About this theme

That’s it! Change the images, colors, add your own background, and contact information image map and you’re good to go! Best part about this freebie I’m giving away is that it still abides by the Myspace terms of use and shows the advertisements, and it doesn’t have any of the stupid  spam links you find on most themes. (Though it would be nice for you to at least add us as a friend)

Don’t just scan this if you want to benefit from it. Trust me the juice is below the headlines.

Awhile back I posted a blog about a few helpful tips that would help get your t-shirt company off the ground, and I briefly touched upon a subject that I decided would make for a great post–when every sale counts. I can’t quite remember where I was reading it, but I read something that astonished me about opening your first e-commerce store.

It will take on average 6 months to a year to get your first online sale

I still can’t believe that anyone could ever think this was true. I have news for you, it’s not.

Don’t send robot PR emails… be human

No matter what you’re selling, before you open your doors you should reach out to similar websites, and personalities associated with your target demographic. This doesn’t mean that you send out robotic press-release style spam emails, but rather personalized emails that show you give a shit about the people you are actually contacting.

We get PR emails at least a few times a week about various products and companies, and I can tell you there is no faster way to get your email deleted from my inbox. The products I do end up pimping on our site, are from people who sent personalized, friendly emails to me and actually proved to me that they’ve been to my site and know what Assault is about.

Keep a look out for forum posts in your stats

After your grand opening of your site, sales probably slowed down quite a bit, as well as traffic. We went through our slow periods right after our initial launch simply because our site hadn’t even been spidered by Google yet. To help during the lull periods, we feverishly tracked our statistics. We were only getting about 50 visits a day so we could see EVERY SINGLE person and how they got to our sites.

We visited the forums referring visitors to us and commented on the posts and subsequently got sales from these posts.

Friends with mutual benefits

While you can run around all the social networks and grab profiles and make a half assed effort to stay active in all of them–you’d be better off picking one or two and pouring all your weight into that.

Even better, when you’re making friends in these networks, make sure you make friends with people that have something to offer you in return. Channel the inner high school cheerleader in you and find friends that can make you look cooler, or more popular.

If you choose Myspace: make friends with people who run large groups. (aka heavy metal groups, Twilight Fan groups, People who live in Chicago groups, Barack Obama groups, etc.)

If you choose Twitter, find someone who’s active and steal their friends! Start @replying to questions they pose or things they say. (like I said, channel the inner high school cheerleader in all of you)

Friends page on your store website

We befriended other similar companies that our customers may like and added them to our friends page. It’s an easy way to email other stores that have similar demographics and ask them if they’d like to exchange links.

Mother**cking blog

Kendra wearing one of our shirts. Does it help with sales-Absolutely.

Blog Blog Blog. I hate using the word blog and I hate that it’s now become a thing that mainstream loves to throw out the word blog, but the truth is if you’re not blogging on a weekly basis, you’re going to fade into the background.

I’m a big advocate of never losing steam with our small business. If I’m not doing or thinking about what I should be doing to grow my company every day, I start to feel guilty. Doing a simple blog once a week takes a few hours, and gives you a medium to push visitors to your online store. On top of that, it’s a little subliminal way of keeping you organized and making sure you’re reaching your goals.

By having a blog you’re always adding content and increasing the chances that you’ll be able to push more people to your store.

My store’s biggest referral is my blog. Hands down. (it beats out even woot.com!)

Never underestimate good customer service

Every store is different, but we built our brand/store around the idea that we’d have a cult following so that the “merchants of cool” who found us would tell their friends, who would then tell their friends, who would then tell their friends. We’re online only as of now so we’re restricted ourselves to who can find us, but just think about the millions out there who never shop online–especially for things like clothing.

Make your customers happy and they will spread your seed–Even the assholes. I know you should even make the assholes happy because I’ve been that asshole. I’ve bought shoes online once, from Zappos. They screwed up my order by sending it to the wrong place, and I was pissed. (For some obscure reason) After dealing with some incredibly helpful customer support they’ve won me over as a self pimping customer for life. I can think of at least three people who have bought shoes from Zappos as a direct result of me telling them about how great they are.

You’ll benefit 100 times more from a blog post about how your customers service went above and beyond. It may cost you a dollar here and a dollar there, but the best thing a customer can do is send you a referral. A happy customer is going to do that.

Conclusion

The first year of running your own e-commerce can be grueling. You’re spread thin over a lot of different areas and you carry a lot of responsibility. I design, develop, and maintain all of our websites and blog all by myself. It’s a lot of work, and if you want it to pay off and grow you have to get sales any way you can.

Have I missed something or do you know of another great tip? Post it in the comments.

It’s 1:15am and I haven’t gone to bed before 3am in about 5 days now… but I’m here with a punch-yourself-in-the-face update that you won’t want to miss. (actually at this time you will have missed this blog post because I put the password back up on the site because search engines were spidering our content)

We now have a new Official Wet T-Shirts Myspace. Just kidding. In all seriousness though, I have been doing tons of Search Engine research the past few days (thus making me an expert on the topic) and upon testing search results via any free online search tool, I found that wet t-shirt is indeed a very popular search term. I wonder if we’ll ever be able to convert any of those visitors into actual sales…

We really do have a myspace, but it’s just a normal one. I’m sure we could get Craig to do something strange if we could just get him to stay up past 9:30pm, but that little guy is still growing! And if you wake him make sure you have a quick getaway or some sort of riot police shield to defend yourself. That guy is scary–no joke. Don’t fall victim to his friendly demeanor as Shan once did. To this day she has never recovered.

The Official Assault Myspace page is all customized and 1337 looking: take that all you 13 year old myspace custom page designers. Feel free to add us as your friends, and if you are wearing one of our shirts in your profile and send us a message we’ll send you a discount code! (maybe even for a free shirt!)

I’ve also taken the liberty to post some hidden codes on our actual shirt designs, and throughout the source code of the web site. Most of them are functioning as of now, but supplies are limited so there’s only 10-25 uses per code. In other words, find em while you can. There may even be some hidden in this blog post… or on the blog’s source code! (we’re clever)TM

On to the business side of things though we now have decided to use an integrated Paypal with the website called Website Payments Pro. It saves us the hassle of having to be slaves to Bank of America and Authorize.net and it’s alot cheaper. It also gets us an online terminal so we can charge items via fax, over the phone, and if any of my (Tim) stalker’s decide to leave their credit cards lying around his posh Chicago apartment. The percentage per transaction on Paypal’s Website Payments Pro is a bit lower as is their monthly rate and the setup is loads easier. (Especially if you already have a Paypal account.) I tried to get approved for loans and merchant business accounts everywhere else but I found that I was jumping through hoops just to get the process started.

Plus Bank of America has charged me probably over a grand in overdraft fees the past 5 years I’ve been banking with them and our relationship has just never been the same. Kinda like when one of your friend tells you twisted sex stories about him and his girlfriend and you can’t look her in the eye anymore because you know what’s gotten in said eye…

…but I digress. I also have a fully functional newsletter on the site for everyone to sign up for. It won’t be one of those newsletters where we annoy the hell out of you and it’s full of spam and we won’t email you every day, or probably even every week. Truth be told we probably just won’t have time for it initially, but I promise I’ll do my best to get one out at least monthly and you can bet that there will be hidden codes in the emails for you to discover redeemable for free shirts, discounts, and full frontal nudity from any of the girls on our Myspace top friends.