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![Paramore – Hayley Williams sings Misery Business on Acoustic [Video]](http://www.assault.it/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/icon-hayley-williams.jpg){kind=icon}
Audio Assault #3 – The One Hitter
Oswald, “The After-Party” Timmy, Jere, and Jeremy had so much energy this week they recorded a bonus episode! This episode covers The Walking Dead (And Zombies vs. Robots in a post apocalyptic battle royale) The guys also wrap up their best things of the summer, as well as what they are most looking forward to this Fall.
Audio Assault #2 – Dream Helmet
In this episode the guys talk about Bob Lefsetz, Burlesque, The Gathering of the Juggalos, Tila Tequila getting hit in the face, wrestling corpses, the ShitBoXXX, (Featuring our first shitty press release about Bret Michaels hosting the Miss Universe Pageant.) the tediousness of hip hop, Drake, and dream helmets.
Audio Assault #1 – The Universal Language of Cock
Jere, Clymer, Oswald, and “The After-Party” Timmy formerly known as “Third World” Timmy discuss how much hypem sucks, as well as the pronunciation of the word hubris, and the universal language of cock! Off-topic… topics discussed were getting banned on twitter, smoking lots of weed, internet personas, spambots, and Russian nesting dolls.
The Load (6/2/10)
This week Load’s features I Call Fives, The Viaducts, The Webelos, How To Destroy Angels, Balance and Composure, and Tigers Jaw. Wear a helmet.
Review: Welcome To Ashley – Beyond The Pale
New album from local homeboys Welcome To Ashley is an instant classic.
Video: Benny Marchant – Conversations Missed
The song is mediocre; the images are striking. Take a look!
Review: California Wives – Affair EP
This Chicago band makes a great first impression with their debut EP – it’s so good, you’ll cut your penis off.
Review: Katy Perry – Teenage Dream
In which Jere ejaculates a lot of words about Katy Perry.
Cutting The Crap: An Intro
Jere investigates some classic musical missteps in an effort to understand how good careers go awry.
We Used To Wait #2: Snooki & Stevie
It’s been a week without any free music – can Oswald keep it together? With the help of Stevie Nicks and Bob Dylan, maybe.
Review: Dale Earnhardt Jr. Jr. – Horse Power EP
Debut EP from cleverly named combo is pretty unabashedly pretty.
Assault Shrapnel #5
Contrary to what you see on Assault, we still have time to lovingly peruse our old music collections. With that in mind, Jere has fired up his iPod, set it to “random album” and reviewed the first three things that pop up. We call is Assault Shrapnel Reviews, where nothing is off-limits and you don’t know what’ll hit you!
Music Video Hell #10: Trade Martin
Now that MTV has about as much to do with music as KFC has to do with Kentucky, the Internet has become our primary source for music videos. With the Internet, though, there is no filter. It’s hard to separate the wheat from the chaff. Well here, drinkers of both tea and coffee, is the chaff. It’s your penance for a lifetime of sins: Music Video Hell. This week: Trade Martin and the “mosque” at “ground zero.”
We Used To Wait #1: Intro
Oswald Hobbes stops downloading music. What will happen?
Assault @ The Movies!: Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World
Jere vs. Scott Pilgrim.
